Hi everyone. I'm sure by now everyone has read or heard about the story about Karla Begley on buzzfeed.com. She is the lady whose family lives in Newcastle, Ontario. They received an awful letter from an anonymous neighbor about their autistic son. On one of the threads that I read, a woman said that Newcastle was a tiny town. A woman and her family living in a small community with an autistic child, getting persecuted by her neighbors, is a very sad story. It's also my story.
My story happened close to twenty years ago. Long before facebook, long before Autism Speaks, long before very much help at all was available, my family got the diagnosis that our son had autism. Within a year I became pregnant and had a very premature baby. When the baby stabilized they suggested I bring my kids in to see her. Not realizing the fall out that would happen, I said that no way would I be bringing my son into the neonatal intensive care unit. That I was worried he might run into an incubator, or cause problems there. Apparently that sent off a bunch of red flags and they became concerned about our baby's safety. We met in a separate room together as family and introduced my son and his big sister to their little sister. All went well, and I thought everyone was happy.
It turns out that the hospital had called the local child protective services. Some time later I get a knock on my door and I have to let one of their representatives into my home and be put through their humiliating scrutiny. There was a young woman and an older man that were assigned to us. The young woman's response after hearing all that we had to say was that maybe we should just put our son into an institution or move out into the country somewhere? Mind you, our backyard was acres of soy beans and across from us there were even more acres of corn field. Just how much country was she thinking??? Well, the old guy got her out of there in a hurry and I thought again all was well. However, he returned again. This time he said that the powers that be didn't like where we were living and that they would be willing to help us relocate to a better place. Fine. We find a new place in a small city, closer to the baby who is still in the hospital, and where we even have some family members.
Yet again, we thought we had everyone happy. Unfortunately, it turned out we had some real nosy neighbors. The baby finally came home. She was on two medications and required quite a lot of care. My son, being motor obsessive, needed a lot of supervision. I was recovering from my third c-section and pre-eclampsia. Without some extra help, it was a recipe for trouble.
One day while I was nursing the baby, my son got out of the house. The next thing I know I have the man from child protective services at my door again. Thankfully, they had more compassion than my neighbors. He just said that we were doing our best in a tough situation and good luck to us. Did this shut my neighbors down? No. Every day when I would go out my front door, one of my neighbors would be on her front porch with her phone. If I took the kids to the back yard to play, her friend would be looking over her fence at us. We were prisoners in our own home. Finally after enduring this a couple of months, we decided to move again.
We decided to move back to the east coast, where we had lived some years before. This required lots of money that we didn't have. We began selling our belongings. I sold my late mother's desk and curio cabinet. I sold every stick of furniture that wasn't necessary. I even pawned my wedding rings and a pearl necklace that my dad had bought my mom in Japan. I never got them back, but we got our family out of there. Though I miss my "things", my family was way more important. It turned out to be a great move for us too. We moved to a major city with a top notch children's hospital and a children's mental hospital that was very helpful as well. We had all the resources and help we needed right at our fingertips to help us raise our unique family. If you read my other posts, I think you'll find we did, and are still doing okay.
So you can imagine now my horror when I read what Karla Begley was going through in Ontario. Another family being put though a trial,due to ignorance. She, however, has access to the internet. She stood up for herself and her family. When the local news called and said they wanted to come over and do a story about her family, she got busy. She got on facebook and rallied her friends around her and they came. Boy, did they come! When her husband left that morning to take their son to school, they were greeted by a crowd of cheering people outside their house! How very wonderful! What a difference twenty years can make! If I had a magazine that did people of the year, she would be my person of the year! I'm so very proud and pleased for their family.
That's it for today. I just wanted to get this posted while I could. I promise a yummy recipe next time! Until then, hugs all around. Nancy
No comments:
Post a Comment